Am i damned?

Well I seek the smiles of Angels, But Darkness calls my soul. every time I think of it, I feel so alone. Please Lord help me fight, Lead me to Your light, And save my soul tonight, Help me know what's right, Are you even present, If so then say where. How can I search for something I do not know is there. You're supposed to be the top being, Powerful, yet kind, But how can You hold this title? When there are problems such as mine. Is heaven and hell Just a state of mind? Is the way lost for all? Do we just take the ten foot fall? I guess that maybe time will tell. And thought I've screamed a little And cried a lot. I've become this person I know I am not. Is life just one big sin, Is there a chance that I'll be let in? or will I walk with the shadows, sing to Darkness in ruin meadows. will I ever be saved from this distress? Am I damned to this loneliness? Please Lord come help me here, I've been living with too much hunger and fear. Come to me and hold me close, So then I will find what I've longed for most.