Dear Mother Nature

Look at my face, how can this be? There's wrinkles there for all to see, Surely these weren't meant for me, Give me a break, I am thirty-three! This can't be right, I must be tired, These crevices are not desired, I'll accept them once I've retired, But please delete, until they're required. Another thing, whilst on the matter, Why on earth am I getting fatter? I need my stomach to be flatter, I haven't changed what's on my platter! This can't be right, I must be bloated! This isn't the size that I was quoted, But it is essential that it's demoted! These errors have been duly noted. Mother Nature, I do despair, How have I found another grey hair? I wanted to make you fully aware, Because what you are doing is really unfair! This can't be right, I must be seeing things, The wrinkles, the hair and the bingo wings, Surely you could pull a few strings, Mend me by morning, before my alarm rings!