High Flyers, Low Lifers..And Some Kinks!

A very hot story, from the airways, Mid-air eruption, started a blaze! Hostess wanted her food in a hurry, But microwave oven, exploded her curry! Emergency landing, forced on aircraft, Crew had sniffed burning, coming from aft! Matches struck, by a flatulent lass… To hide the smell…from a volcanic ass! Man’s stupid sex game…made him look silly, Things went awry, and he padlocked his willy! Headline to story : “Bit of a lock-up”… Surely a misprint…should have read cock-up! For rumpy pumpy, pair chained to bed, No afterglow...frustration instead! During gyrations, they’d lost the key… Firemen summoned, to cut them free! Officer drunk, did not her car stop, When ordered to do so, by a fellow cop! Then apprehended…domestic strife… Lady arrested, was other cop’s wife! Lady in China, picked up her dog’s poo… In paper packet, to toss into loo! Thieves on a bike, the package did zap… Moral of story?...a load of crap! Slippery Swiss made a smart prison break… Bent prison warders, out on the take? No!…bollocks naked, and with nary a scratch… Lathered with soap, they’d crawled through food hatch!* *Based on, with some poetic licence, material obtained from ananova.com.