I Am Broken

Hallow longing served only by lackless persistence Unachievable, my happiness; so vividly unclear Wants and desires contrary to genuine need; pursued without effort exceeding cerebral means Confused assurance of self-owned ailments precede an unused, only assumed cure Assertive desire to alleviate my thoughts; taunting and mocking they chase me, they trip me, they tie me to myself I'm irrational, I make sense. I am found in being lost. I barely get by A life coasts before me as I cruise control my mind False self-worth, false self-confidence, falsely self-assured... False SELF Accusations of my own ghosts, hauntingly hypocritical words; spoken of a jealous tongue I run, I can not hide; I distract, I still haunt my own mind Assess, diagnose. Internalize, fear Fear loss of my excuses as actions demand me Consequences deemed unbearable; reality, unfathomed A destiny seemingly uncertain in the mythical hands of joy Defeated, feast my comfort food, default to my soul's misuse Forgive me? Too kind. Undeserved, unexpected Excuses, my glue, barely hold together the most broken of souls I am broken