If at First You Don't Succeed, Just Give Up

My latest experiment: Slice my hand and leave a dent, Fingers soon are pockmarked with incisions. To feel some well-earned pain is my new mission. But you know, I’m so weak-willed, and This is the cutter’s guide for children…. The darkness turned into my friend The good kids left me in the end… When I started thinking of darker times, When I started to lose my smarter side…. When you said I’d never make it, Well I knew that you were right But the truth is another thing That I just have to fight But with your kind permission, Don’t ask about my bad decisions…. I’m not that sweet kid anymore. Another suicidal writer on the floor. It’s not so much a mental sickness As much as a silent commitment…. Goodness knows I’ll never write now Goodness knows I’m not all right now I’m not good enough to leave a mark Upon the blue veins in my arms I’ll keep them all hidden on my palms Gosh I hope he doesn’t hold my hand tomorrow Nice to know I’ll give it all away When his male libido comes to play Goodness knows I’ll never be a writer There’s no way that the future can be brighter But bodies lay about my feet And I am prepared just to meet That ready blade you’re so kind to provide Thank you, the pleasure really is all mine Goodness, I cannot be a writer or a poet now With all my blood and consciousness flowing out I’ve never felt enough to make you cry And God, all I ever wanted was to write…