Love is never benevolent?

You are the hope, the uncertainty, and the rock Within my mind. Taking, Jonesing’ for your touch Itching for your love. Smack this alarm going off in my brain That screams your name when you are not here To kill my pain And kiss my lame limbs back to life again Give me the niche of your love to fill this need, I’m running far from the ground Your name is the only sound Whispers at me in the breeze Rushes at me as I fall to my knees. No child, this is not my desire… I’m greased up in the oil slick that is your love I’m polluting my world with my thoughts of you And your dangerous hugs. Its welling up inside of me This mineral turns to gold In the lightness of your eyes, Irises of chemical indecency. I hate to want every piece of this; Earthly need. Driving my picket fence into the ground beneath me, Tainting the white paint, With everything I want, This pulsing melody inside of me. I’m digging into the grass, green with envy Creating a grave as I sleep Every dream I dig another 3 feet I love you so, I’m letting you kill me…