Love that cannot be heard

Sometimes silence feels necessary, but not endurable, even if it’s a choice we both agreed on. The silence we chose to stop it from blossoming, our elixir, which could turn to poison for those who mattered more. But as time has passed, I rue my awkwardness, ruining the only true connection we had, by never showing you who I really was. There was appreciation first, then sorrow, envy, and longing. Doubts tangled with obsession. But over the years, love replaced want. I’ve come to see the bonds and sacrifices, to respect the choices you made. Even though you never reciprocated, your voice lives in me more each day. For better or for worse, you did what you thought was best. And that is all that matters— the rest, I leave to silence. As I clean the years of grime from my eyes, I think and smile. But thanks to life, in your absence, I’ve learned how to love you.