Lying to myself

i've got these weakened knees falling deeper it seems heals over head--mentally i can't see where i stand unless i look up from the ground but i might be a little to far down to see anything now so i try and pull my pride back up straight from my spine hoping i can find some daylight 'cause all this darkness is starting to pull me apart and it gets harder to pick myself up and fight knowing i'm never gonna win i get bruised up and broke down so easily but at least i don't feel nowhere near the pain that i should 'cause i keep lying to myself to help ease how i feel i might live a long life but i'm gonna die a liar