My fidelity

Always claiming to love someone so deep, Was I ever so sincere? Always complained that I have lost in every field, Did I ever really persevere? Growing older everyday, and still nobody, And now it feels like evening is here. Lobbied for loyalty all the way, Where was mine ? Asked for truth all the time, Then why so many lies? Knew discipline and consistency brings the change, And still, I let them die? Are temptations so strong for men, That they cannot be crushed for our lives? Is lust so essential to be fed, It's absence makes you wanna die? Why blame fortune, pain, and a love so fine, When the fault was all mine?! A man of character, A man of substance, A man of his word, A real man with an actual life... Oh, I destroyed him Oh, I spoilt his name. I'm so ashamed, He won't be able to see himself the same way again. I have never been a faithful son, Never a sincere lover, Neither an honest friend, Nor a good brother. Am I a sinner or are those petty crimes? Can my destroyed image be healed with time? I kept looking for fidelity in others, And today I ask, where has been mine?