"No Viagra Required?"

Browsing through ads...morose, somewhat solemn, I happened to glance through the lonely hearts column, Heading "50, gorgeous, no Viagra required," Such confidence, forsooth, I truly admired! My response, in rhyme, was sent off like a shot, Did I fancy my chances? Most certainly not! For the lady herself in glowing terms did describe; Way 'bove my league, and not of my tribe! A message in verse, my heart skipped a beat, From said gorgeous lady, how very sweet! The gist somewhat cryptic, but that does not matter, A telephone number...shall we meet for a natter? With trembling fingers, said number I call; An answer from her? No, not at all! Gutt'ral male voice says wrong number; oh hell, Next time waspish lady, same tale she does tell! Checked dialled number with one she did send, No copying error...I'm now at wits end! Whereto from here, all contact be scratched? Flawed judgement perhaps?...are we really mismatched! To shorten long story, date, time, venue set, For an encounter,I'd much rather forget! Fifty? gorgeous?, Viagra...misrepresented, To have fallen for that line...ego was dented! Sloppy, unkempt, too much body art, Seemed on a trip, on a planet apart! With glazed leer: "Care for a zoll?" Then "sorry, must fly...off on a jol!" Weeks later said barman who'd served us our drink: "Boy! did that weird doll sure say you stink! "Old nerd with a boep...a real fuddy duddy; "Free one for the road?...thank you, my buddy!"