Queen of hearts

Was invited by the queen of hearts (I think) to some sunset schwa-ray Dusted off the old penguin suite Damn, I still look good Took a short cut through the enchanted woods Got to the palace in the nick on time Serving my favourite red wine Watched a catfight between snow-white and goldilocks Apparently prince charming was a two-timing pig At least, that’s what I heard Little red riding hood was burning up the dance floor with grannies new suede shoes I went to have a puff on the veranda Then spoke to a two-faced girl called Miranda Glanced at the ceiling Saw the ginger bread man hanging from a chandelier Purple underwear sticking out Urgh!! not very appealing Caught the big bad wolf, trying to steal my half-baked crumpets and lemony creams Had to laugh at his pink polka dot shoes A clock struck twelve Carried on shoulders were some drunken elves Swaying from left to right Some still on wheel-barrels as they lay, In the garden, snoring I woke up with chipmunks knocking In my head this morning…