Queer

I have a tendency to declare my ethics of epic proportions Yet I was reluctant to let my hands wander Along the hemlines of mothers, sisters and girls Riding the rails and fences Burning my fingertips as I sensor the passion's flame Scratching knees and departing the skin to reach within The depth that bid off my manhood And I swore to never travel that road again I have a tendency to declare my life in a bigger picture To scrawl my thoughts mixed with unhinged passion As my hands once again wander They travel the valleys of my own shadow To the very poignant point of my temple The very essence of my nightly despairs As I tune out the images that haunts me But seem to slowly awake me from my slumber I have a tendency to look beyond all reasonable doubt As I traveled the sordid parts of my small world Moustache kisses and trembling I fumble my imposter As we stand as close as our poles allow As close as my breath, and my own disapproval allow They turn me inside-out with their whispers Their promises of a good time And I revisit those hemlines And my scattering looks towards the boys by the swings Our nightly adventures catching fireflies and swapping penis size Flesh against flesh, measuring our manhood’s proudly I have a tendency that I’ve come to terms with It has haunted me for years It’s been staring down at me Slapping me with the words of God Thrown me out at sea, where hands tried to drown me Thoughts of close ones disowning me These are neither childhood games nor exploring the unknown It’s more than stains on my sheet More than the awakening to a brand new day Coming to terms with the tendencies that haunted me for years Now we’re just queer old friends