Searching for my Hero

There's a difference between getting someone's love and someones attention, but the way we go about getting it is for the same underlying intention. We want the spotlight shininng down on us and we dont care if we make it look so obvious To me, the ever rolvolving world and the people living in it are the backround, the are the supporting cast of characters that we use to better our story, just like they use us when were not around we need to use them for our own glory.. But what i really need is an identity cause all i have is a faint memory of the hero im searching for.. Maybe he doesnt want to be found though., cause i have flashed all the signs and i have sent out all the signals and hes still hasnt made his long awaited comeback.. Ignoring many of my attempts. Worshipping a hero who doesnt even notice can be the most devistating blow to us.. I've accepted the fact that he mite not no longer exsist but trying to find and impress his is a feeling i can not resist. I even wonder if he's watching me and what notes are on his list.. After all the blood sweat and tears that i have spilled, its the void inside of me that im still looking to fill. For some its a battle and its up-hill. Shooting dope, smoking crack or popping a pill, the way we handle our own business isn't always so logical. But it makes sense to me and my insanity.. Why would i want to travel down the long winding road when i can just taje the shortcut to what i think is sanity? Thats why i got to repave the road that im on that is drug addiction.. I know there are going to be some detours and some roadblocks along the way like there were before , but this time there wont be any experimenting the deadly variety on my one way street towards sobriety..