Unarmed villain

Dear lover, lost and lovely You don't like it so I'm sorry, I won't call you my lover or anything you don't like ever. Yet, I have something to say as I can't bear anymore this weight of words that remain unsaid and life which feels so dead. Dear pretty, Ms. A , I'm not as wise but I want you to understand Though I know you won't see it but I can't be silent You know I have tried silence for years And it works everywhere but not on remanants of yours. I have been a mad person so jealous and insecure that I have always doubted you and your acts fuelled it more. But probably that's how you act when you love someone so dearly , You can't bear presence of anyone else in her life even if they've known her barely. I know people today would call me a crazy man someone whom feminists demand to be in prison as I'd stop you from seeing someone else while I'd still love you more than myself. I'd probably be labelled a "rapist" of free will and free voice A potential villain of "my body my choice" and I'd be played by the ugliest man in the movies who'd be thoroughly abused, beaten and hated . I can't relate to what they sing these days , probably because I'm an outcast only meant for hatred. But they don't even care for my existence, I realize now that I'm not even hated. I'm simply forelorn and forgotten and my name's been blackened by humans. I have tried to find peace in studies and movies (not mainstream) . I'd think I'll get solace in someone someday But I can't drink, smoke or bet but also 'coz once you said I'm modest and modest men don't do acts so low chivalrous acts are what a man should show. I can't go back to old ways, I'm now too numb and... ah well Enough done and enough said, I'm proud that I was even talked to once by a model who easily forgot me but for me, she remains unforgotten Over five years have passed and I'm still here, If you'd see this, you must be glad , dear oh Dear... .