Who i am

When i think about who i am as of this moment I still see a kid with a wounded child mentallity whos to scared to face reality A soilder whos always on the defensive instead of being on the offensive Always looking to unload on the weak so i can keep my superiority and my winning streak The feelings are uncontrolable how much i dont like to be open and vulnerable I'll push you away before i let you in , but i'll bring you down with me and take you to my next sin My attack is always strategic like a game of chess Im always looking to be the best but honestly and truthfully i got to start dropping my guard and stop making things on myself so hard I got to pull back the view cause i aint better then anybody else Im just as equal as you Im a cool guy just looking to fit in but if you asked me to find myself i wouldnt know where to begin Ive mistaken anger and pain cause to me love and hate its all the same I could tell you all the war stories ive been through but i would rather tell you how i feel instead i mean i can show you the scars on the back of my head but those arent the scars that haunt me late at night when im lying in bed its the ones on my heart and my soul that have really taken the toul Leaving me to self aware, leaving me another feeling i just cant bare When i feel so much and i want it to stop my only relief is to disconnect myself and try and be different then everyone else Cause thats when i really fit in without having to try and this world embraces me for who i am instead of passing me by